Trump Administration’s Venezuelan Puppet Exposed

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Friends, I’ve become a Juan Guaidó fangrrl. Big time. Sure I think he should be arrested and put on a farm somewhere he can lose his treasonous heart and massive ego and learn to contribute to the social collective rather than serve the ultra-rich elites whose thievery alone makes them special, nothing else.

(And if I haven’t mentioned it, he’s also the hand-picked puppet of the Trump administration and Marco Rubio to take over Venezuela if they succeed in violently removing elected President Nicolás Maduro. So Guaidó is a tool of useful imperialism and a useful idiot.)

For all his awful, Juanito, Juan-Juan, is amazingly photogenic. Perhaps more in the manner of Mario Moreno than Che or Chavez, but his mugging and irrepressible need to look like a great leader along with some sick CIA voguing skills has results in a scrapbook suitable for any US administration, but somehow particularly Trump’s.

The Human Dutch Tilt

Let’s begin with a classic. This happens a lot in boy bands, “Oh gosh, I’m just out here enjoying life and suddenly I’m popular! Luckily I remember to wave to the fans at home in that caught-off-guard casual moment manner that works so well for both Disney and the CIA.”

It doesn’t get un-realer than this!

A variation, “You just caught me at my most beloved, and I’m so full of team spirit, I may explode like a giant CIA bomb! Hahaha! No really, I’ve completely lost control of my own (manifest) destiny.”

In the human-Dutch Tilt motif, “Touch the Sky” is my favorite. It combines a Renaissance striving to touch the Divine (no, not the drag queen) and bring divinity onto one’s self with the aesthetic sensibilities of a music video.

In this case the subtext is both the colors of the Israeli flag (a covenant) and –again- the awkward but engaging angle of popular marketing. Popular marketing for the popular resistance -Hashtag that!

But what does one wear when one is being sworn into an office never sought nor attained?

ANSWER: A dour face, blue suit and tie, flag pin.  And just don’t worry if the eyes cross.

Personally I would have staged it Hollywood in the 40s. Little People with strap-on wings ushering Juan-Juan towards a dias on a cloud. Surrounded by stormtroopers because that point needs to be made.

FAMILY LIFE

MAGIK OUTERWEAR

DON’T. MAKE. GUAIDÓ. ANGRY!

And there is just no better way to end this segment than to tie together US imperialism, its contingency upon its vassal states, and millennia of libel and rumor.

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