Really Lazy Friday: A stroll down memory lane in Turkmeniscam, ExxonMobil editon


I’m really pressed trying to finish up Hack List 2017: Jeff Bezos, Modern Day Pinkerton Head Cracker, and the Washington Post, but I would be remiss not to mention, and exploit, this press statement released today by TrumpExxon executive vice president T. Rex Tillerson, marking Turkmenistan National Day.


There’s really no need to click on that link, you won’t find Thanksgiving recipes. It’s just T. Rex more or less kissing the ass of one of the planet’s worst dictatorships, which happens to be — though this is not mentioned in the statement — a country with vast energy reserves coveted by ExxonMobil.
“We send the people of Turkmenistan our best wishes as you celebrate this special day, and we hope our partnership grows stronger over the next year,” writes T. Rex. “Gee, thanks,” the people of Turkmenistan have replied by now, “Why don’t you fuck off until you stop supporting our shitty regime.”
Anyway, I have to be fast here, as noted above, so let me just link to a story I wrote for Harper’s a few years ago when I fucked a bunch of top Washington lobbyists by going undercover and getting them to tell me how they would polish the Turkmen regime’s image, for fees of up to $5 million, natch.
You can also read this Los Angeles Times op-ed, in which I defended undercover reporting from mainstream critics after my story came out and humiliated a bunch of lobbyists who are sources for my mainstream critics. “I’m willing to debate the merits of my piece, but the carping from the Washington press corps is hard to stomach,” I wrote. “This is the group that attended the White House correspondents dinner and clapped for a rapping Karl Rove. As a class, they honor politeness over honesty and believe that being “balanced” means giving the same weight to a lie as you give to the truth. I’ll take Nellie Bly any day.”
And you can also click here, at this wonderful site put together by the utterly delightful Brooke Kroeger of New York University, to see where my story fits within the history of undercover reporting and to get information about how to order my book, “Turkmeniscam: How Washington Lobbyists Fought to Flack for a Stalinist Dictatorship,” which grew out of the article. And which you can order directly here.
In this Kirkus review — which was pretty lukewarm, unlike many others, which I don’t have time to find — my book was described as, “Readable and well-reported, though openly partisan.”
Haha. Partisan. Me? Never.
OK, I have to get back to work, see you soon.
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