Get Smart: Why Does Marco Rubio Have A Hard On for Regime Change South of the Border? Was He Stiffed by a Venezuelan Hooker?

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One question that has long plagued me and other leading international observers is why Florida Senator Marco Rubio, one of the dumbest and most corrupt members of the senate, is working so insanely hard to prompt the Trump administration to overthrow the government of Nicolas Maduro? Sure, that proves he is dumb but it doesn’t answer the question about the hooker.

Before going further, let me say flat out that to the best of my knowledge Little Marco was never stiffed by a Venezuelan hooker, nor has he had sex with a horse, as the feature picture for this story clearly was meant to suggest. But neither of those things would surprise me.

Betting back to the questions posed in the headline, Rubio only does things in exchange for money or because he’s a right-wing anti-Cuban, or because he’s a a moron. In the case of Venezuela, he’s seeking regime change for all three reasons. But because I’m writing a book about Venezuela, which will include a chapter on Little Marco, including a lengthy section about his alleged affairs with multiple women, including lobbyists, I have to save the best material for this upcoming bestseller.

Hence, for now, I can only reveal the part about him being a right-wing anti-Cuban, and how that drives his Venezuela policy.

Venezuela provides a lot of subsidized oil to Cuba. If Cuba had to pay for that oil on the free market, it would be fucked because it doesn’t have the money to do so. Little Marco thinks, and he may be right, that if Cuba had to pay for oil it would create havoc and discontent domestically because the economy would grind to a halt and children would starve, which is what Little Marco wants to happen because he thinks that would lead to regime change in Cuba, which is his most cherished goal.

Why? Because he’s a moron and because his biggest donors are right-wing cretins in Florida.

So if regime change in Venezuela were to happen, the new shit heads in charge, who are backed by Little Marco, will cut off oil shipments to Havana and children will starve, the Cuban government could fall and right-wing shit heads will take power. Little Marco believes he will greatly benefit from all of this because he’ll become an even greater hero to the right-wing anti-Cuba lobby in the U.S., raise more money from these cretins and become president one day even though he’s too ignorant to read from a teleprompter in Spanish or English.

And that’s all I can say at the moment because I’m saving the rest for the book. Hablamos luego.

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