Well, if you hate the Patriots and root for the Redskins — knowing it’s hopeless but out of loyalty to your son — this was generally a shitty week for football. I had a vision — and I even posted it on Facebook and Twitter before the Patriots’ game kicked off — that Tom Brady would suffer a series of painful hits, and a helmet to the ribcage would be a game-ender for him on Sunday.
Tragically that didn’t occur but Brady has taken some vicious shots this year — it’s clear the entire league despises him and whoever takes him out will achieve hero status — and the Falcons clocked him a few times. There aren’t a lot of great teams in the NFL this year — we’re at rough parity — so it’s always possible the Patriots will win another Super Bowl.
But I seriously doubt it. They could easily be 3-4 but they eked out victories in a few games they should have lost. Their defense is terrible. The last game was their best of the year but the Falcons — like the Panthers a few years ago — are a psychological mess after blowing the Super Bowl. As I said at the time, and this was confirmed Sunday, Brady had a good second half in last year’s Super Bowl but if Ryan had a pair of balls his team would have won the game handily. He’s a choker and showed that again last Sunday.
Meanwhile, Brady is aging and, as mentioned, is taking a beating every game. That’s going to catch up with him, this season and in the future I foresee him drooling into a bib at a lunatic asylum and blissfully unaware that the attendants are feeding him meat in violation of his vegan diet. Obviously, the attendants will hate him too.
In other news, the Redskins showed that the Dan Snyder curse is as strong as ever and, I fear, that Kirk Cousins doesn’t have what it takes to win close, important games; the Seahawks managed to beat the terrible Giants, but they are going nowhere and will never be a contender again until they fire Pete Carroll, the man who cheated them out of a Super Bowl a few years ago by not handing the ball to Marshawn Lynch; the NFL has many, many terrible quarterbacks, with Jay Cutler being perhaps the worst; and the most exciting player this year, and in quite a while, is Texans QB Deshaun Watson. He leads his team against the Seahawks next Sunday and the Texans are going to blow them away.
OK, everybody, let’s maintain that positive spirit and keep envisioning Tom Brady in intense pain, crumpled on the ground and spitting up blood after a crushing blow from a 300-pound-plus lineman. Hey, it’s just karma, he’s an evil, evil man and he has it coming to him.